The Bond Street Cut

The Dandizette’s good opinion once lost is not always lost forever, but in order to get back into the dandizette’s good books the miscreant may find him or herself delivered of the Mount Street Cut.

Tyne O'Connell Bond St Cartier Mayfair puffy purple ballgown

Tyne O’Connell delivering the Bond St Cut outside Cartier Mayfair

 

The Art of the social Cut dates back to the earliest Dandizettes. Ladies could not fight duels to punish a sleight and yet nonetheless needed to uphold their reputations following insult or public humiliation.

Even a novice Dandizette must be skilled in the Art of Cutting. Compare the Dandizette Cut to social exclusion. There is only one cut from which it is impossible to recover and this is the Bond Street Cut Direct.

The Bond Street Cut Direct

The Cut Direct is delivered by looking directly into your enemies eyes as you meet them at a social gathering or pass them on the street. When delivering the Cut Direct the Dandizette looks straight into her enemy’s eyes without the slightest hint of recognition- for of course as far as she is concerned, said enemy no longer exists either fig. or lit. If their name is ever mentioned in company the Dandizette will feign complete ignorance and no amount of prompting or reminding will enable her to place the miscreant again.

The Ancient Egyptians cut out the names and images of their enemies so that they would cease to exist – so is the case in the Cut Direct with Dandizettes. Once delivered there is no going back.If you are unfortunate enough to find yourself receiving the Cut Direct your sin must indeed be grave. All will pity you but none would want to be in your shoes. Travel to far off lands has never seen so appealing than when one is the recipient of the Bond Street Cut Direct.

The Half Cut

However, not all cuts are as deadly and many are not even terminal. There is still hope for example after the Half Cut, This is the cut in which you feign not to recognise your enemy until they are totally convinced that you have delivered the Bond Street Cut Direct. Only as the miscreant sees social death flash before their eyes does the Dandizette relent and warmly acknowledge her enemy. The Half Cut is a shot across the bows, a warning that you are on your last life. Should you persist in making yourself disagreeable to this particular Dandizette, you may well be on the receiving end of the Cut Direct next time.

The Cut Oblique

The next cut down from the Half Cut is the Cut Oblique which is usually best delivered in a social setting such as a drinks party. The Dandizette will greet those surrounding the miscreant warmly though her relationship with them may be quite slight, Finally, just as the miscreant believes himself a victim of the Cut Direct, she will look at him as if suddenly finding herself able to place him in her memory after all. His relief is palpable to all. He has survived…just, But he can be in no doubt that he has offended the Dandizette gravely and must make reparations. That diamond brooch in Bentley & Skinner really was very pretty.

The Cut Revocable

The Cut Oblique is similar to the Cut Revocable differing only that rather than suddenly remembering her miscreant’s name she asks them to remind her. For a Dandizette to deliver the Cut Revocable, the miscreant must have erred so so gravely that the Dandizette has probably done battle with herself and her conscience and feels his sins worthy of the Bond Street Cut Direct and only her sweet and forgiving nature has held her back.

The Mount Street Cut

The Cut Downward and the Cut Modest known as the Mount Street Cut are reserved for miscreants one passes on the street rather than in a social gathering. The Cut Downward is delivered by pretending not to see the miscreant until they are directly upon one. The miscreant and Dandizette both know that this was not the case and the resulting awkwardness is as sharp a rebuke as a slap. Likewise in delivering the Mount Street Cut Modest,the Dandizette pretends that the miscreant hasn’t seen her.

Again, the miscreant and Dandizette and anyone witnessing the scene are fully cognisant that the Mount Street Cut has been delivered, however awkwardly they get around it. The most piquant aspect of the Mount Street Cut Modest is that it will be gossiped about more than any cut other than the Bond Street Cut Direct. You will be an object of social pity for some time. Perhaps it is time to take your annual holiday but remember on your return, that diamond brooch in Bentley & Skinner, it really is very pretty.